Let’s be clear T O X I C is one of the most many over used words of 2020 and rolled over to 2021. Between it being televised and social media-lized (if that’s a word)  many people have run off with this word in a frenzy along with the word narcissist labeling everyone in their life as such. Let’s start off by saying every relationship isn’t toxic but can show toxic traits and be careful because in certain situations we have to check ourselves to make sure we are not the toxic ones.

What is a Toxic Relationship?

A toxic relationship is any relationship that is harmful, unhealthy, and threatens one’s state of well-being either psychologically, emotionally, or physically. This form of relationship is not only limited to couples, boyfriend/girlfriend, but can also be spoken of between Boss & employees, between two friends/siblings, landlord to tenant, etc. Relationships that include physical maltreatment are inevitably toxic in nature or in which individuals are reliably giving more than they’re getting might be harmful too, particularly if the individual who is giving more feels degraded and exhausted as a result of it. Furthermore, any relationship where you are unsupported, misconstrued, belittled, or assaulted is toxic. On a fundamental level, any relationship that aggravates you instead of making you feel better can be harmful after some time.

Dealing with a Toxic Relationship

1. Admit that the Relationship is Toxic

The first and foremost thing to do when encountering a toxic relationship is to admit and acknowledge that you are in a relationship that is unhealthy to you. You have to admit that any relationship with a partner that lies, cheats, mortifies you, misuses you for cash or different assets, or genuinely or truly manhandles you is toxic. You have to admit that any partner that causes you incessant agony and doesn’t consider themselves responsible is doing you more harm than good.

2. Communication

As a matter of fact, you’re going to need to ensure that the communication lines between you and your partner are solid. There can be numerous reasons why a relationship is toxic or being harmful, and the area of communication can be a reason for that. In case you’re simply not tuning in to one another, or can’t even understand one another, at that point there is a serious issue. So in order to make things work between each of you, you have to call your partner in to order to start communicating with you more effectively. You’ll be astounded by how powerful this can be. You two should take part in profound, significant discussions. Discussion about things that are important to you, things that have harmed you, what you like and what you don’t, discuss on existence, affections, feelings, interests and everything that is at the forefront of your thoughts.

Proficient communication can go a long way to ameliorate that toxic relationship of yours in no time. Though you may feel insecure by discussing your most profound feelings and contemplations, yet at long last, it will all be justified, despite all the troubles. Always converse with your accomplice in any event, even when things feel awkward. It will permit you to comprehend the relationship better and know precisely your position in such relationship. In conclusion, also do well to inform your partner immediately you notice any toxic behavior from them.

 

3. Iron out the Problem with the person

This means calling someone in to sit in order to pinpoint what the actual cause of the toxicity is, so that you two can find a solution to it. You have to be really outspoken in this context so as not to hide anything behind. Sit the person down and discuss with him or her what they are doing that is actually hurting you, be it anger, the way they yelled at you, the way they maltreat/abuse you, the way they always ignore you, etc. Have a true and open dicsussion with someone, as well as asking for his/her own opinion. Then you and that person can now proceed to discuss and agree on the way out of those problems.

4. Acknowledge You are at Fault Too

Pertaining to you, try and comprehend, distinguish and acknowledge your errors that has rendered your relationship poisonous and harmful. What so ever has made things harsh, both you and your accomplice are similarly to be blamed. By identifying and accepting your own deficiencies will go a long way to at least fix some of the issues. Correcting yourself is way simpler than correcting your partner. Isn’t that so? So begin by distinguishing your part in the issue and amend your way to improve things.

By acknowledging your own fault and sentiments instead of putting all the blames on your partner will go a long way to free yourself up to comprehending your partner better and what precisely should be fixed in your relationship.

5. Giving Each Other some Break

At the point when things are getting worse, you may likewise need to give each other some break, that is, being away from one another for some time. Doing this can help you both to see plainly what is causing the toxicity, as well as finding solution to it.

This period of staying away from each other can be utilized to consider your relationship, consider when things began getting bad and the amount you are to be blamed for turning the relationship harmful. It will likewise make you and your accomplice miss one another and acknowledge how much worth you hold in one another’s lives.

6. Always be willing to Adjust your Ways to Suite people

This involves you compromising your normal lifestyle to suite other. Learn how to endure and always respond things like anger with peace, yelling with quietness, etc. Know what your partner is looking for, for instance, if what he/she wants is respect, then do all your possible best to be humble and always give him/her the respect. Focus on peace, as well as the love you have for your someone.

7. Quit the Relationship

I know this may sound very bad to some people. But the truth of the matter is, after trying all the options listed above with someone and they continue abusing and taking you for granted, refusing to change. Then maybe you are not meant to have that person in your life and that is okay. Your happiness and well-being should be of higher priority to you, and I won’t advice you to totally sacrifice them to someone who doesn’t value them. Maybe all you need to do at this point is to walk out of the relationship. There are so many people out there who will definitely treat you better.

Have you dealt with a toxic person before?

Check out the video I did about are you toxic?

Remember, if no one has told you lately. I am so proud of you!

Your Favorite Coach

@gojenbefit

Jen